1.18.2010
So here we are, more then halfway through January of the new year and once again I'm wondering where the time has gone. Since I'm not allowed to work for another month I'm starting to get a little antsy. I am definitely not ready to jump back into full time work but this not working at all business is for the birds as far as I'm concerned.
As I was saying, it's a new year. Usually as January first approaches so do the ideas of resolutions; not for this girl. I was never really a resolution maker per say. This year however is different (kind of). Since becoming ill nearly two years ago, my life changed in every way imaginable. Now before I continue here this is not some, "oh-my-God-I've-seen-the-light-and-must-spread-the-word-Oprah-Ah-Ha!-moment". So let me continue...
So as I was saying, I'm not a resolution maker and my life has changed. Before I received my original diagnosis, I had already given up pop, soda, whatever you want to call it. I stayed on the wagon for several reasons and for nearly a year. Things changed with my stem cell transplant. I had such intense cravings after that procedure that ever since all I want is Diet Mountain Dew. Now I'm not advocating what is anyone else should or should not do, I just know that it isn't good for me. And considering pop, especially the diet kind is full of aspartame someone like myself with a genetic predisposition to growing a cancerous tumor needs to stay far, far away from the junk. This is easier said then done because you have no idea just how intense the cravings were. My taste buds have changed so many different times it has been comical to see what I will or won't eat or drink. With determination I started to abstain on 1.1.2010. I was going to be done with soda once again; no ifs, ands, or buts about it. There was no way I was going to let a twelve ounce aluminum can that could only be compared to the sweet nectar of the Gods control me.
I didn't even last a half a day...
I caved. What is it about this sweet treat with zero calories that has me hypnotized? I was entranced. I tried the flavored waters, the Izzie carbonated fruit juices (which I love as well) but how do I put this? It's just not the same. There is nothing like taking a cold can of your favorite soda out of the fridge and feeling the smooth, coolness of the aluminum beneath your fingers or that sound it makes as you crack the can open and watch the few drops fly either on your shirt or over your head as it is cracked open. Then it hits your lips and there is that refreshing, familiar taste and the feeling of the carbonation as it hits the back of your throat that nothing else can compare to no matter how hard you try. I heart pop; canned, fountain, bottled; you name it I simply can not get enough...until now.
Instead of a resolution I decided it was just simply enough. I'm thirty two years old and I've survived cancer and I'm done abusing my body (well for the most part). My goal is to give up pop again and I will do it. I am armed with my Sigg bottles (I have this thing about plastic which will have to be another post but in a nutshell I think plastic will be the death of our world) filled with filtered water and chilling nicely in the fridge so the next time I get the urge I can reach for that instead. I will still most likely have a can of my delicious liquid treat from time to time but that's ok. Life is much more enjoyable in moderation.
